What Maternal Mental Health Month Actually Means (And Why It Matters This May)
By Stephanie Arrington, LCSW, PMH-C | Heights Psychotherapy | Jersey City, NJ
May holds a lot. It's the month we put flowers on the table, write cards, and celebrate mothers. It's also Maternal Mental Health Month, a dedicated time to raise awareness about the emotional and psychological experiences that come with pregnancy, postpartum life, and parenthood in all its forms.
I've always thought it was meaningful that these two things share the same month, even if they can feel like they're in tension. Mother's Day asks us to honor mothers. Maternal Mental Health Month asks us to actually care for them. Both matter. And they are not the same thing.
It's More Than the Baby Blues
Perinatal mental health conditions, including anxiety, depression, OCD, PTSD, and psychosis, are the most common complication of pregnancy and the postpartum period. And yet they remain widely underdiagnosed and undertreated and the effects can last for years. Part of what makes this so frustrating is that the gap isn't due to a lack of effective treatment. It's due to a lack of awareness, access, and honest conversation.
A few things worth knowing:
It's not just postpartum depression. Perinatal mood and anxiety disorders (PMADs) can begin during pregnancy and can show up as anxiety, intrusive thoughts, rage, numbness, or difficulty bonding. Symptoms don't always look like sadness. They can last months or even years into motherhood, and they often go unrecognized because they don't match the cultural image of what "struggling" looks like.
It can happen to anyone. Regardless of how much you wanted your baby, how supported you are, or how prepared you felt going in. Your mental health is not a reflection of your love for your child or your readiness to be a mother. They are a medical condition, and they deserve to be treated as one.
It is treatable. With the right support, most people recover fully. You do not have to white-knuckle your way through this.
For Every Kind of Mother's Day
Mother's Day is complicated for a lot of the moms I work with. It can bring up grief, exhaustion, ambivalence, the ache of unmet expectations, or simply the wish that someone would ask how you're really doing.
If that resonates with you, I see you.
You don't have to perform happiness on Mother's Day. You're allowed to feel exactly what you feel. This year, I want to offer one small invitation: take five quiet minutes before the day gets busy and ask yourself, "What do I actually need right now?" Write it down. Then, if you can, ask for it.
That act of naming what you need is one of the most powerful things you can practice. It doesn't have to be elaborate. It can be an hour alone, a meal you didn't make, or simply saying "I need help today" out loud to someone who loves you. Letting someone take something off your plate isn't something you have to earn. It's something you deserve because you're a human being who needs rest.
Getting Support
If you or someone you love is struggling, please know that help is available and you don't have to figure out where to start on your own. A few trusted resources:
The National Maternal Mental Health Hotline offers free, confidential 24/7 support for expecting and new moms. Call or text 1-833-943-5746. Postpartum Support International has a free helpline, virtual support groups, and a therapist directory at postpartum.net. The 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline is available to anyone in emotional distress, around the clock, by call, text, or chat at 988lifeline.org.
Working With a Perinatal Mental Health Specialist
As a licensed clinical social worker with a perinatal mental health certification (PMH-C) and over 16 years of clinical experience, I specialize in supporting mothers through every stage of the journey. Whether you're newly pregnant, newly postpartum, or years into motherhood and finally ready to name what's been hard, this work is what I'm here for.
I see clients in person in Jersey City and virtually throughout New Jersey, New York, and Florida. If you've been sitting with something and wondering whether to reach out, I'd be honored to support you.
